everytime i come home my father loops me back into this cycle of creating websites or blogs for him as if i hadn’t done it time and time before. he also asking for help, assistance or guidance, or is in sudden need to ask me how to attach a document. he seems to be completely oblivious to the fact that i really don’t care. i don’t care to help him. i am just very much over this. this constant repetition, the fact that i’ve been creating websites for him since I was fourteen, just so he can abandon them to ask me to create more is exactly how i know that i must end this cycle. how will i end this cycle you may ask, well i will be glad to tell you. by only coming home when it is utterly necessary. my father has the nerve, dare i say, audacity to ask me if i want to work with him again this summer. calling it my program. it can not be my program, because it were in fact mine, i would give a damn about it. yet again, he’s being the dumb dog that his flee ridden mind suggested he would be.
i must admit though he is being pleasant. but it’s always a toss up, sometimes he’s either a shifty and stuck up…or he’s pretending like he never learned how to read. i can at least respect the former, at least that can be rationalized. when he’s playing simple, it makes me feel bad to get upset with him, but i don’t like girls that are extremely ditzy and i absolute don’t like men that are in their mid-60s to be ditzy either. it is not very becoming. not at all.
on one way situations… indefinitely. i am done. no need to respond at all. please do try other venues, upon your desire, but acknowledge that there will be no reciprocation, as that has been your forte.
no worries. we’re square.
I haven’t written in years. I blame my stupid busy life. So many things have been going on personal and school wise and I feel like I shouldn’t bring any of it up, but then again I think, if I can’t blurt out my business all over the internet then where else will I blurt it.
I will not blurt.
But I will digress. I have so many things that I’m supposed to do, am doing, going to do. And yet, I don’t want to do anything except kick up my heels and coast away. The only class that I’m caught up in is Ceramics. Close second, Spanish. A very lagging third is Math…now I can even tell you where my independent study lies, probably in a ditch somewhere. I’m gonna have to work shit out like billy blanks..or else i’m screwed, proper :(.
I’m listening to Marina Gasolina, a song that I am heavily in love and will prob follow it with 99 problems by JayZ because even though this song is old, I suddenly love it. this love is real and I respect it with my entire heart and will indulge. Favorite lines:
“Are you carryin’ a weapon on you I know a lot of you are”
I ain’t steppin out of shit all my paper’s legit
“Well, do you mind if I look round the car a little bit?”
Well my glove compartment is locked so are the trunk in the back
And I know my rights so you gon’ need a warrant for that
“Aren’t you sharp as a tack, you some type of lawyer or something’?”
“Or somebody important or somethin’?
Nah, I ain’t pass the bar but i know a little bit
Enough that you won’t illegally search my shit”
I also have to meet with Debbie Southern on Wednesday about the damn Lady Gaga party, if she doesn’t reschedule me again. I bet she’s gonna reschedule me again though. I bet a whole fist full of pennies and a Cindy Widcliff.
Okay, I’m gonna do my work right now. Best wishes for my next cameo. 🙂